A small metallic basin is set upon the desk. If activated, a small holographic version of Isidor can be seen. This device is used to record his musings and thoughts in real time. This entry appears to be very DATED. A newer, less malicious entry can be seen next. I left Andrei behind. I left him to die back in the Antares galaxy with that whore, Big Foot. Who names an Apex Big Foot? She most certainly isn’t a product of Miniknog space, that’s for sure. As it is now, I am worried, but also at peace. I am a solitary creature. It’s nice to have the only footsteps in the ship be my own. For once I can rest in peace, work on my creations, and truly relax. No more loud mouthed little brother around to bug me about seeing the outside of the ship. At this rate, I may actually be able to get a full night of sleep for once. Though that full night of sleep is probably not going to come for a long while. I’m worried about him, and about the Miniknog. On the very outer edge of the Antares galaxy, I ran into a Miniknog agent. The bastard grazed me with several bullets, and actually managed to land a solid hit on my left shoulder. Just a few inches lower, and I’d be dead. Of course, I took some stims, visited a doctor just before leaving, and then got the hell out of there. I am worried that he is following me, or worse, is setting up an ambush in Memoria. If his ship was advanced enough, he could calculate my trajectory and find me pretty easily. But I can’t worry about this. I have to get to Memoria. I don’t know what it is that I’ll find there, but I know it’s going to be groundbreaking. Maybe it will enlighten me about the happenings of Memoria, or, as I am hoping for, it’ll tell me about my own people. I have a couple of theories myself. We Apex are very similar to humans biologically, and looking at the G-Net, I see some of the creatures that humans evolved from. In appearance, we’re very similar, but intelligence wise, we’re far more advanced. I believe that we were once a rogue colony of humans, or even some sort of near-human race that sprung about in the depths of space. Using the VEP, we became what we are today, physically devolved, but mentally advanced. What this means for our history pre-Miniknog, I don’t know. We’re told that the Miniknog was always present, guiding us forever, but… I can’t believe that. I want to know what’s on the inside of this ring, and what it’ll lead me to. The only problem is that I left Andrei behind. What would our father say? It was my job as his older brother to keep him safe, to keep him from doing exactly what it is that he is doing. But I lost sight of the goal. I let us stop in Antares for a few days, and now he’s gone. I could turn back, drag him away from that useless bint… But I can’t do that. It would go against exactly what I told him I would do. In doing this, I’ve given him independence. I could always send him a message… Though that probably won’t go over well. Big Ape be damned, I don’t know what to do! Isidor is seen pacing around the room, his hands folded behind his back. His left shoulder is heavily bandaged. When he returns he kicks over the chair and violently snarls. Big Ape be damned, what if he is killed… What if he goes back to the Miniknog? They could send him after me, and then what would I do? Put him down myself? I couldn’t do that, could I? No, this is nonsensical. I could never end his life… Unless he was Miniknog. Isidor nods to himself, If he goes Miniknog, then it is my duty to the family to destroy him. And that is that. The hologram shuts off suddenly.
Playback Entry #2: So much has changed. I was a fool. Looking back on my previous entry, I know for certain that I was not in the right frame of my mind. How much has changed, and how much I owe my dear brother. But truth be told, I cannot allow us to grow close again. Not yet. I am sojourning myself away, spending some time alone. I must get a grip on myself, on reality. Listening to some of the inane things I said in that audio log… Isidor paces around the room, his hands folded behind his back. I wasn’t prepared for anything. I could never have killed my own brother. Instead, I put a gun into his hands, and told him to kill for me, to be my tool. Luckily he isn’t dumb enough to do such a thing, but still. The things I’ve asked of him, done to him, can’t be forgiven that easily. Sure, he may have forgiven me, but I cannot forgive myself. Isidor settles into a seat quietly. How can I make amends? My dreams made me blind and mute, focusing only on myself. Words are nice and kind, but they are nothing substantial. In truth, the only thing that I believe I can do to make amends is completely reforge our relationship. Andrei is in a good place in life. Me? Not so. I have nothing. Sure, I have a ship, a gun, nice tools, but those things don’t really matter. Well, maybe the ship is a bit more important, but still. I have no one in my life. No friends, no relationships, no enemies. It’s like I am a blank sleight. I can’t let my brother and his mate be my support. I have to learn how to stand on my own, how to think on my feet. And when that happens, maybe then I can forgive myself. Letting out a sigh, Isidor leans forward in his chair. I was certainly wrong about this Big Foot woman. She seems to be doing much for him, keeping him in check far better than I ever cou- No. My job wasn’t to keep him in check, it was to be his brother. As for her, her job isn’t to keep him in check either. The only thing that she needs to do is keep Andrei happy. And she’s already done that far better than I ever have. In truth, for the first time in my life, I don’t know what to do. I’ve always had a goal, a logical reason to do something. And now? Now I’m leaving on a journey simply because it feels like the right thing to do. Perhaps it’s a sign that I’m changing? Whatever it is, it’s certainly a change. I let down that wall of ice that I usually keep so thick. Perhaps it’s better to let people in? Is it worse? I don’t know. But it is the first step in establishing any sort of meaningful friendship. Leaning back, Isidor runs his hands through his hair. For a long while he is quiet, simply covering his eyes with his hands. In a moment, he slowly lowers them, plucking off his spectacles as he does so. I’ve also decided to tune out the dronings of Dmitri. That man is crazy, no matter how much my brother defends him. Sure, he may be our father, but still, he believes the best thing to replace the Miniknog with is another Miniknog. He almost had me convinced of it myself, and if it wasn’t for Andrei, I’d probably be throwing my life into the fray at this very moment. Isidor spends several more moments in silence, quietly rubbing his face. After a long moment, he places his spectacles back on his face. With a nod at the recording device, he begins speaking again. Where do I go from here? I don’t honestly know. My relationship with Andrei won’t ever be the same, not until I accept forgiveness and learn to forget. These steps I’m taking, a journey, they surely will help. I’ve relied on Andrei to be my voice for far too long. It’s time that I move on, adapt. Meet new people, see new places. Experience all of the things that I’ve wanted to since I left Miniknog space. I’ll seek out an ocean, and watch the waves. I’ll find a forest, and smell the wind and leaves. I’ll walk a shifting desert, and climb icy mountains. And when I am satisfied with myself, having been molded and reshaped by these experiences, then I will open myself up entirely. Isidor reaches behind his neck, unhooking a chain. On the chain is an ancient signet ring, which catches Isidor’s eye. He stares at it for a long while in silence, before tucking it into a vest pocket. I will give the ring to Andrei. He deserves it far more than I do. He has been the one who has kept the family together, and is the one of us who will most likely keep the family going. When next I see him, I will put it into his hands. Isidor reaches over to the recording device and suddenly shuts off the recording.
Playback Entry #3: I’ve made my preparations. Got my gear, sufficient amount of supplies, food, and water. I need to speak to Aiko and Andrei, and then I’ll be off. Isidor’s data pad laying on the desk flickers suddenly. Hmm, that’s interesting. Someone sent me some sort of warp codes. I’ll check this out and finish this up later. The entry ends here.
