[Connecting to StarNet] [awful dial-up sounds ensue] "God awful machines." [Error: Try again later.] "I swear to God." [Connecting to StarNet] [horrible dial-up sounds ensue.] [Connection successful! Enjoy StarNet] Login: BitchesLuvMahDick69 Password: ******** [closes pornographic popup ads] [hastily makes way to market before the ads pop back up] Hello, all. I have recently come into a couple of big ticket items that I'm looking to sell. These aren't just pieces of uranium to power your ship or a ship to be powered by uranium, but rather something for the man out there that's looking to satisfy his inner demons and fill that perpetual emptiness with some good, old-fashioned, expensive buys. The first item up for sale is a solid-gold statue that was acquired while on an archeological dig in a centuries-old Avian tomb. It's in good condition, and would great on anyone's mantle. It's the perfect conversation piece. The second item is more of a grab bag. While talking with a colleague about a startup company I'm forming, he expressed his desire to help fund my endeavor. However, my poor companion had no pixels on his person. But, what did he have, you ask? Fossils! These fossils are eons old and would look great displayed on the walls of any home. Nothing like a piece of priceless history to spice up the joint! And our final item is very simple: a gold bar. In my travels, I recently acquired said SOLID gold bar and would like to get pixels for it. Respond back if you're interested! - William S. Edward [more pornographic ads pop up.] "Whaaaaaaa-" [logout]
