A godless Grounded pirate feathersuit and antitheist zealot was teaching a class on . . .

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A godless Grounded pirate feathersuit and antitheist zealot was teaching a class on Rochard Hawkwings, known atheist.

“Before the class begins, you must get on your knees and worship Hawkwings and accept that he was the most highly-evolved being the world has ever known, even greater than Kluex!”

At this moment, a brave, patriotic, pro-Flightless tomb guard champion who had served 1500 decades of service and understood the necessity of human sacrifice and fully supported all military decisions made by the Clipped Council stood up and held up a holy book.

"How old is this text?"

The arrogant professor smirked quite Floran-ly and smugly replied “Only a few years, you deluded zealot."

“Wrong. It’s been 5,000 years since Kluex created it. If it was only a few years old and the Sunborn, as you say are not real… then it shouldn't match the handwriting of existing documents written by Kluex before he ascended."

The professor was visibly shaken, and dropped his chalk and copy of The Kluex Delusion. He stormed out of the room crying those Grounded crocodile tears.

The students applauded and all signed up as Ascendants that day and accepted Kluex as their lord and savior. An eagle named "Praise Kluex" flew into the room and perched atop the Avosian flag and shed a single tear on the chalk. Flightless prayers were read several times, and Kluex himself showed up to allow all those present to soar forever in the Aether.

The professor lost his tenure and turned to piracy the next day. He was defeated by the Holy Fleet and sacrificed to Kluex and remained chained to the ground for all eternity.

Praise Kluex

 

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