ScarletSongbird

Reality is frequently inaccurate.

He had been told that when looking for a good oracle, it was best to find the oracle that other oracles went to.

Isn't it enough to see that a garden is beautiful without having to believe that there are fairies at the bottom of it too?

"My capacity for happiness," he added, "you could fit into a matchbox without taking out the matches first."

And a big hello to all intelligent life forms everywhere … and to everyone else out there, the secret is to bang the rocks together, guys.

And so the problem remained; lots of people were mean, and most were miserable, even the ones with digital watches.

I'm the person who's leaving for a week to go on vacation! So long, and thanks for all the fish.

One of the extraordinary things about life is the sort of places it's prepared to put up with living.

Every single decision we make, every breath we draw, opens some doors and closes many others. Most of them we don't notice. Some we do.

Let the past hold on to itself and let the present move forward into the future.

NO ADMITTANCE. NOT EVEN TO AUTHORIZED PERSONNEL. YOU ARE WASTING YOUR TIME HERE. GO AWAY.

A common mistake that people make when trying to design something completely foolproof is to underestimate the ingenuity of complete fools.

Grown men, he told himself, in flat contradiction of centuries of accumulated evidence about the way grown men behave, dont behave like this

There was a point to this story, but it has temporarily escaped the chronicler's mind.

It is a mistake to think you can solve any major problems just with potatoes.

He would insult the Universe. That is, he would insult everybody in it. Individually, personally, and in alphabetical order.

It's part of the shape of the Universe. I only have to talk to somebody and they begin to hate me.

Why should I want to make anything up? Life's bad enough as it is without wanting to invent any more of it.

I can't help but feel I'm becoming obsolete.

There is an art, the Guide says, or rather, a knack to flying. The knack lies in learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss.