-In a medical closet, on a ship, sits a messenger bag next to a bag of weed. Inside the bag is a box of syringes labeled "anti-psychotics". Next to that is a glock without a clip, safety on, resting aimlessly next to a little black book. The cover is slick. The first page has mad-like scribbles including drawings, random coordinates, and phrases. In the middle of all the chaos is the title "Juxtaposition of the mind."-
Hello journal, Hi my name is... Well, my name is... Never mind that, firstly my name is just a construct of this universe, yes? What's in a name? Why do I give a fuck what a name is? Maybe my name is 'Ashley the lesbian lover', stealer of hearts. Maybe I'm just that mute girl who stutters behind closed doors. Maybe I'm a backstabbing bitch whose name isn't spoken. What am I then? An entity of fear incarnate? My skin. Is it a pearly white? A sun licked brown? I'm not sure. I am sure, but, trust is a thing you have yet to earn Mr.Journal. Sometimes things in my life are bent and distorted. Peoples' mind's a delusion. Everything they see is "correct" and "right" but as per equal and opposites proves they are indeed "incorrect" and"wrong." My mind though "wrong" justifies things and makes them "right" sometimes my mind doesn't want me to feel pain, but makes me feel immense pain. Just in case I decide to do something "wrong." So, the question today is "What is good and evil?"
Hey Journal remember this for me... John - Cute robot, super serious. Blaze - Silly bitch want sum' fuk. Leader of the power rangers. Gay dood - Givin' it to that bitch ass floran. -Ranz - Snobby cousins, rich, might fuck, and steal money. Joshua - Capitan fuck n' fuck and his funky crew. Riko - Fishy medic for RA, sucks. Other Mute girl - Really proud to be mute, hoe as well. Walker - Odd fellow, likes watching his TV show. Victor - Cute butt, angsty renegade. Gerik - Green haired poser. Leader of the power rangers. More later... Don't tell anyone Mr.Journal or I'll burn you alive.
-There is some drawings of two people, an avian in armor and a girl.- My erotic friend fiction. W: Come here my mistress! You want payment Rook? He sensually strips out of his armor to reveal his throbbing extension... -It gets very graphic, the most notable scene is a sword fight using genitals between the avian and some floran slave named "Meatstick". Rook dies of a broken heart and Walker is forever sad. This takes up a few pages.-
Mr.Journal, Life is a terminal disease transmitted sexually. I'm glad you'll be here since you're not alive unless someone reads you. Also, I'm sorry I keep stabbing you with this crappy pencil I jacked from the hospital.
Mr.Journal, Your reserve and silence feels judgemental and loving. Kind of like a disappointed father who has to reprimand his child even though he doesn't want too. My father tried to hang me... Too bad I was too light to suffocate. He wasn't though. Stupid hair...
Senor Journal, New people: Ace - Bitchy bartender on Tar-anus. Aubs - Stupid douche. Caden - Probably Aubs, also a stupid douche. Gill - Odd fish thing that taught me the word frisboner. Seems to have a colorful vocabulary. Types in all caps. Doesn't like booze. Might be a bounty hunter, probably not. News Taranis was attacked by some kind of unmanned drone or some shit. I was drinking there last night.
-This section is written in red pen. For some reason.- Dear Journal, First test with operation bump, success. Subject seemed pleased. I read that people used to mix the name of people they put together. Brad + Angelina = Bragelina So... Cody + Eve = Cevey Gerik + Eve = Geveik Blaze + Eve = Beve John + Eve = Evohn This is fun. OTP: Danny + Aubrey = D'awwbrey! -This part is circled with a heart. The red pen emphasizes this.-
Dear Journal, New peoples. Dirt-Feet - Quiet avian, man whore? Gay. Cody - Upstanding type. Seems pretty average. Too average. 6/10 might bang. Jamal - Likes purple, might be dead. Scientist dude... - I think he got knee capped that same night Gill got in a fight with Danny. (( Jarneck. )) Danny - 2/10 breath taste like dick. Bad kisser. Looks cute in girl clothes. Destroyed one of his couches. Phillio - Innocent looking bird kid. 0/10 too young. Last night Gill got beat up a little by Danny. Some other shit happened I wasn't really paying attention. Phishing for nudes on my phone. Trying to get a small album of local smut for a project. -A small drawing of an overly shiny and cartoony butt is drawn in the corner of the journal.-
Mr.Journal, I got mugged a few moments ago. I was gonna plug the fuck but I didn't want to blow open the threads. I should go shoot up, to take the edge off, and take a nice nap. Maybe go dip and clean myself up first then lay about in my skivvies while my clothes spin. -There is a smear of blood on the page in the shape of a heart.- Anyways, Reminder, write up an AD program for that thing, I thought 'Vegan Bacon' would be a good title. P.S. - Thanks for listening to my bitching Mr.Journal. P.S.S - Going to tell you about life when I was in school later. Drugs are kicking in.
Mr.Journal, I promised I'd tell you about the seventh ring of hell that was school. But, fuck you I'm busy. Notes. -Erythritol taste better then sugar. P.s. - jk, luv u 5evr journal bby. Pls dnt leave.
Dear Journal, So... School... Most precious blood catholic school. Known as the only all girls school in the area. The teachers were assholes, everyone was blind to the beatings, and the school pushed more drugs then a cartel in Columbia at the time. Only nice thing about school was that it wasn't home. All the girls wanted to stay thin so they could live out their penultimate destiny of being some poor sap's bitchy housewife before they die. That's why they smoked cigarettes instead of eating lunch. The teachers changed student's answers on test so their grades would drop. Only so they could do some "extra credit" getting more then one thing up... After being constantly slandered by teachers and treated as an outcast I realized I was living in a morally base hell. Yeah, maybe the Supermax wasn't such a bad place after all. A meal every five hours, time to work out, and a library to escape reality for some time... People left me alone too... -The text at the bottom is bled out from a tear drop.-
Hello Journal, Don't recognize me? Don't be a douche. Watched a brother get flogged with a chair after he showed me a nude of some pastey bitch. The girl was some kind of robot with a stick up her asshole or lack thereof. Anyways, after she flogged him he capped her knee with a glock. Fun times, except, he got all pissy. I hate when he gets mad. His voice just starts to sound shrill and he, like, turns into this mean alien, and all I want to do is hit him. I hate changing... I morph and just everything goes blank. Not like forgetting shit but like just... Blah. I looked in the mirror the body augs really fuck with my head. Am I going crazy? Wait, I am crazy. Am I going crazier? Fucking fuck why the fuck am I fucking losing it? Fuck! I should just off myself then the girl in the picture won't be alone in her Hell. We can be together. That sounds nice... -The drawings on the page are twisted. A distorted melted looking human face, a beach with the water colored in red, and a chair with only three legs. The rest are just stray pencil scratches and oddly written words which seem to have no relevance. Amongst the words is "away", "fuck", "aliens", "go", and "-ing". They are written far apart from each other.-
-The pages following have spreadsheets of numbers and calculations. The next couple pages have blue prints and sketch concept art. The most notable are drawings labeled "City Sector". Under each is a rough calculation.-
Monsieur Journal, I'm gonna move you to a more discrete location. I haven't heard much of Walker I think he has been a little AWOL. I have big plans. I can't let anyone know about it until I establish some structure. I need to find a speech therapist. I can't keep stuttering like this. I was talking to this Cody guy. He might be able to help me. Otherwise I'll look into a vocal implant but I'd like to avoid body augs. You like the purple couch or the white one? I'll just hide you under my bed mattress... At least it doesn't smell like Danny's butthole.
Dear Journal, I'm pretty sick.. I think it is a side effect of the vocal implant. My throat is all scratchy and shit and no amount of beer or soda will fix it... Anyways, I divided up my mail routes. Mainly Taranis and Opportunity for now unless there is call to another bigger colony. I got a Deadman switch letter to deliver to a guy named Josh whatever. I vaguely remember him. His voice sounds familiar but I can't deliver the fucking letter without ID because Deadman Switch letters are like when people die and they hold the same legal things as a will and need to be sent to the user specifically. No exceptions. Oddly enough it is a military deadman letter which means it is a double classified document. I'm so tempted to open it but... I took an oath to deliver mail, not to fucking read it. That one fishy chick "Hylotl whore" seemed pretty off put by the letter. I wonder what they say. Am I just delivering hate mail? I never really read them... Oh well. The letter smelled nice at least. Like a love letter sprayed lightly with perfume. I think the whore's afternooner came and they banged or something because they left and came back some time later. Oh yeah, there is this Gerik guy he's like a poser douche. Hangs out with the Blue haired chick. I feel like that bar is some kind of weird hideout. I see people talking but I see people's shifty ass eyes too. Could just be the Soldiers on the colony. Weird that police can make people feel so paranoid, huh? OH one more thing Mister before I put you back in your tomb. This stupid bitch.... Holy fuck. She flirts with me then goes all soft on me. Then she tries to downplay me like she is hot shit. Honestly, it looked like someone flogged her with bat and didn't take her to the hospital after. Anyways the stupid cunt grabbed my ass so I fucking decked'im. GG bitch.
