[*several moments of static before Treeknife begins to speak.*] "Treeknife'sss making a diary. Treeknife heard from friendssssss and Treeknife thinksssss thissss isssss a cool idea. Treeknife guessssessss that sssaying to sssssomeone hissss sssssecretssss will let go of ssssssome tension. Treeknife'sssss gonna sssstart now. Log one. Treeknife found a friend. Treeknife alsssso found a new home. And ssssssome new recordsssss about animalssss. Treeknife thinksssss thissss wasss very pleasssssing. But Treeknife issss dissssapointed becausssse of rude Floranssss who yell and make hisssss earssss hurt. Treeknife wantsssss to ssstab. But Treeknife can't sssstab becausssse Juliusssss ssssaid no sssstabbing. Treeknife isss disssapointed by lack of sssstabbing but Treeknife will have to deal with it. Treeknife getsssss to ssstab a lot of thingssss anyway becausssse Treeknife alssso hasss a job now! Treeknife getssss to sssstab animalsssss and bring them to Missssster Hex for Pixelssssss! Treeknife thinksssss thingssssss are gonna be good. End of log."
"Log- cough- two. Today wasssss not a good day for Treeknife. Treeknife wassss taking a day off, becaussssse Treeknife could usssssse ssssome ressst. Ssssso Treeknife flew to Taranissss because Treeknife felt like Occumelonssss and Meatwine. Treeknife got hisssss drink from a Metalman and chewed on ssssssome tasssty occumelonssss when all of a ssssuden, A Floran comessss out of nowhere and asssssksss to sssssee treeknife'ssss glassssesss. And then the ssssstupid floran- Sharptooth, Treeknife thinkssss wasss her name- tellsss Treeknife to ssstab her. Treeknife lovessss sssstabbing, but for ssssome reason, Treeknife thought that it wassss needlesssss. Bigesssst missstake Treeknife did. Treeknife should've ssstabbed her and run all the way back to New Chicago. But insssstead, Sharptooth challenge Treeknife for a duel, and treeknife accepted. Which is Why Treeknife hassss a sssscar on hissss cheek and had hissss throat sssstitched. Treeknife losssst the duel. Treeknife can cheer up, though, because Treeknife sssstabbed Sharptooth in the chessst. Treeknife hopessss that maybe sssssupid Sharptooth will bleed out and die. Sharptooth'ssssss mate issssss nice, though. A very nice metalman. Treeknife will probably visssit Taranisssss again for sssssome more meatwine and Occumelonssss. Ooh, and maybe pusssssplumessss! End of log."
"Log Three. Treeknife'ssss not sure what to write here today. Nothing much happened. Treeknife did find a huge egg yesssterday, but it hatched and the creature ran away before Treeknife could ssstab it open for sssscience. Oh well. Treeknife enjoyssss working for Hex. Treeknife caught enough animalssss to feed New Chicago for a while, too!
